Life is more like a train. The harder you run to catch it ,the faster it moves away; patiently you wait, the next one you get. Hi , I am Ajay back again. Waiting for my morning train , to reach college in time, to attend a class, just to continue my disturbed slumber .Alas ! finally got my train. Travelling in a train is an absolute pleasure. I stood firmly near the barricade which read ‘Don’t stand near the door step’. Hmmm. But rules are meant to be broken.
The train stated. I checked around ; it seemed to be little desolated ,devoid of the rushing crowd and suffocation. Relived from tolerating the breadth of your fellow passenger. I didn’t feel like resting my legs, so remained standing. Oh!! Just now noticed;a girl form my college is standing before me,leaning back on the opposite barricade.I noticed her looking at me. But when she noticed that I noticed, she turned away. As expected. Men always get a pleasure when women ogle them. Only few men accept the pleasure and even fewer women accept that they ogle.My memory suggested that I have seen her before . When and where ?. I don’t know!. Don’t even know her name. I ‘may have’ interested her , but honestly she didn’t interest me.
The train slowed down on reaching the next station “Mambalam”. Busy place even in an ‘unbusy’ time. But my luck or the girl’s luck , many didn’t board in at the door near which we stood. So that she can enjoy looking and I can enjoy being looked An old lady entered the train. Torn clothes , unconditioned hair, old bag were all enough to prove that ‘she is a beggar’. Beggars are the only people on earth who dares enough to accept that they beg. Little ironical. We all have begged , beg and will beg ; at some point or the other. But for richer things, which helps us to be unfit for the ‘beggar fratenity’. She went in to earn her living, asking for alms. Finally got back to the place where I stood. She stretched her hands to me. An old wrinkled hand with some new glittering coins. I knew I am being noticed by that girl. So to earn more of her attention, I took my wallet out ,carefully searched for a coin and dropped it on the beggar’s hand. Feeling proud!!. The girl will adore me more for my generosity. Checked my watch, a little late for my class.I peeped out through the door. Hmmm will reach saidapet in two minutes.. I exhaled.
I eventually noticed the old lady. She seems to be in her middle sixties. She could not even stand still , her legs shivering.. Well it could be because she has some rheumatoid dysfunction or may be she didn’t have food to give firmness to her old fragile legs. Her eyes are wet, with little drops of water down her cheeks, ya ya its called tears.. Its been long time that I wept, so forgot the term tears. Her lips moved, but her words unheared, She is lamenting something ; probably to herself or to some spirit standing beside her. She should be bemoaning about something, which bemused me ‘about what??.’ Her life, what else it can be. Our train reached Saidapet. She cleared her tears with her well clenched hands, not ready to lose her hard earned money. She placed her one leg on the platform, followed by another. “Thud…” I heard a sound. Just then realized, she slipped and fell down. Her money spattered away. In a quick movement , she stretched her arms and picked up her coins. It seems like she is competing with some one in the ‘picking game’. Making sure she got everything she dropped; she sat down in an awkward position and stated crying. Hmmm .. finally she felt the pain. The train started its journey . Again me and my admirer alone.
The old lady, her pathetic life, her needs pulled my attention away from the warmth of the pleasure which the girl’s look granted me. My parents always have informed me that “ its only God’s grace that we have everything in life”. Then why is their God not gracious to this lady. Some have told me that only good people get good things. Then ‘is she bad?’ . I don’t know!!. I have enough , then am I a saint … who you are kidding?? . Its not just her destitution that bothered me . ‘Her age’. “Why is nature so cruel to let us grey rather than die young” I thought to myself. My mind feared over the fact ,“one day I am going to be old too”. This trembling, loss of sight , delusions all are waiting for me. Perhaps ,for all of us. I could not get those tired eyes with pathetic tears from my mind. It sung a melancholy song which I heard.
I wondered what her family would be like. Everyone begging , as if a family profession. Or was she chased out of the house by an odious son and a cruel daughter-in-law?. She doesn’t seem to have anyone now.Her eyes squealed that to me. I not only felt a need for money , but a need for care from her.
She is in the end of her days. Death may walk up to her anytime. Dying may be painful, but dying alone with no one to care or moan or even cremate our body (with respect) is agonizing. She is facing that each day.
A stern voice distracted my thoughts “… we should not encourage begging…” a man standing near me said to his friend.
The other friend caught up his tune “… ya ya .. only in India they walk up into a train and ask for money.. We Indian never change… See other countries..”
“Exactly Ram . They all earn more than us , with zero tax…” the first man said. And both had a hearty laugh.
‘We Indians never change’ I chucked . But we Humans have changed a lot. Competition has become the mantra of this day. We compete even with people ,who beg for their living. Our logics have become strong, but our values perishing. ‘Survival of the fittest’ resurfacing in human society destroying human civilization and humanity.
Every day we walk out of our house with faith on us, our government and human constitution. But she thrives only on her faith in humanity. What can I do to help these cursed people. What can I really do?. I can only write my emotions out to reach the ‘human part’ of the reader’s mind.
“Hey you , not getting down..?” a sweet voice enquired . It’s the girl .
“Uh… what ..” I shrugged.
“Chrompet .. we have reached …” she smiled.
“oh … ya ya..” I realized and got down with her and said “thank you”
“ You are welcome…” she smiled and walked up the steps.
I combed my hair back, adjusted my specs and checked my watch.
“Oh my God, getting late for crypto class!!!!”……
